What if?
by detectiveram
Summary: What if Artemis was the one dealing with the lies? The guilt was getting to her. Brief story about Artemis dealing with the aftermath of Wally's supposed death. Obviously AU.


I've actually been thinking about this idea for awhile. I was going to write it about Wally and maybe his guilt lying to everyone. Then I was like, let's mess with emotions more and think about Artemis. It's only about her thoughts about Wally going undercover. Who she blames... Goshhhhhh... She thinks about what if...

* * *

What am I supposed to do now? He's gone. Not for good. Never for good. Of course everyone else thought that. Why did he agree to this? Why did I let him? He's going to get killed out there. I hate him for leaving me. I hate him for...

No, I can't ever hate him. I saw this coming after he put that costume on again. Nightwing dragged him back into this. Well, he let himself be dragged into this. At least I got a kiss goodbye. Still, I'm going to blame Nightwing. I need someone to blame for my misery.

"Artemis!" Speak of the devil knocking on my door. He left me alone for a bit to collect myself. I didn't need it, but he might've. He's more emotional than I am sometimes. Or maybe he went to another secret meeting, without me. Why am I so angry with him? He's keeping me in the loop at least. We're the only two that know the truth out here.

I met him at the door. "Let's just get this over with."

He sighed at me. "Please Arty. He's supposed to be dead. Everyone's going to expect you to be crying at least."

"I don't cry." I shot at him. Okay, I'm still mad at him. Wally wouldn't have gone undercover without his prompting. I didn't want this for him. There's going to be a lot of times where…he's going to have to do things you can't erase from your memory. Like Kaldur. Poor Kaldur.

"Please. I'm sorry Artemis. He's going to be fine. This is for the greater good."

"No. You don't get to talk to me about the 'greater good.' We were trying to have a life together. What if he slips up? What if he uses his speed? What if he can't save someone? And, you know what…he might have to…attack us, or hurt someone. He'll never forgive himself. He'll…" I will not let him see me break.

"We have to know what the Light is up to. Kaldur and I agreed on this. Wally agreed…He's the best hope we have right now."

That's where I drew the line.

"No Nightwing! He's not! I was! You were too scared to put me back in that situation! I am way more equipped to handle this. I have the connections and the experience. I've dealt with these hardships before. I'm not...innocent..."

He stopped me with a hand on my shoulder.

"Wally didn't want you to be put in those situations anymore. I don't know the details about what your dad made you do as a child. I don't know everything that happened to you, but Wally wanted to protect you somehow."

"Typical. My knight in freaking yellow spandex."

"Artemis, I'm sorry, again. I didn't know you would take it so bad… I would have done it. I really would have, but this team couldn't function without me right now."

"I know Nightwing… I get it."

"If I could have done this without dragging you two back into this…"

"Just shut up. You're making it hard for me to hate you."

We traveled in silence back to my old home, Mount Justice. I missed this place. I missed the people more. But this was the hard part. I didn't want to be here. Pretending to lose him. Lying to their faces. I get the risks of other people knowing, but…

M'gann was the first to greet me. Crying on my shirt. I might've shed a tear. One. How could I not? She's my best friend. Not only does she think Wally's dead, but La'gann… I know a lot of people don't care for the boy, but Wally and Kaldur promised to help him. I wish I could tell her that.

"I'm sorry Artemis… So sorry."

I felt terrible. This is probably why Nightwing left me alone for a while. So we both could work out our lies. How could we keep the truth from them? From everyone? Nightwing glanced at me and shook his head. He knew what I was thinking.

I choked out a response for M'gann.

"M'gann…I…thanks."

Conner gave me a hug and a muttered apology. That almost killed me. He wasn't emotional like this.

I gained nods and apologies from everyone. Most of them didn't invade my personal space. I was grateful.

The entire time though, I kept looking back at the former Robin. He gave me small smiles, fake. What happened to that cheerful boy? The responsibilities he putting on himself…

"Recognized Flash 04. Recognized Impulse A-12."

Oh…no… I can't deal with him. Not right now. It's going to take every ounce of my deception skills and training just not to blurt out the truth to this man.

"Where is he! Nightwing!"

"Take it easy Flash. I know…I'm sorry."

"No! No! This is not right! How dare you pull him back into this! How dare you let this happen! How could you! You were his friend!"

"You don't think I don't feel terrible about this!" Nightwing yelled back.

I wanted to yell at him. Don't let your anger and pent up guilt out on this saint of a man!

"I was his best friend! I am! You don't know how much this is hurting me. I don't need this right now Barry!"

I stared at him. How could he yell at the Flash? My Wally's uncle. How could he stand lying to his face?

"I'm sorry Nightwing. I just…Wally." Barry pulled off his cowl, tears streaming from his face.

"I blame that Kaldur. I can't believe he did this. I'm…I will get him. I swear I'm going to make him pay for taking my nephew."

I turned away from that conversation now. I couldn't listen to Nightwing lie anymore. I hated myself already for lying. Everyone left me alone after that, confronting the Flash, trying to take his mind off of the hurt.

Unfortunately one little speed demon didn't get the memo. "Bart." I might have choked on his name. He stared at me, like he knew. He didn't know…did he? Oh please no…

"Artemis…I wish this didn't happen… He was never supposed to die."

Then he hugged me. And I let him. This is not going to be easy. I just stood there holding him. I looked at everyone again. Solace.

"Artemis…"

No…no…no. He had broken away from the others.

"Artemis…I don't know…what to say. He was my nephew and...I loved him. I know you did too... And..." He was crying more.

"You're all I have left of him."

What? No…

"I'm not family…"

"Don't say that. You are. You've always been. I'll be here for you. And I promise you I will find justice for Wally."

This is not going to end well.

"The last time I talked to him…he was telling me how much he was looking forward to…how you were his life…"

This is not good. He can't form sentences. What was he saying about me and Wally?

The moment of words were lost. He almost picks me up hugging me, along with the still clinging Bart. It's only then I cry. Because our deception is hurting so many people.

It didn't have to be this way… If Nightwing had spoken to me first. If we could live in a world where this deception wasn't necessary. I didn't have the family that Wally did. I had the team. And I had my mom. But mostly, I had him. Without him…

Well, It would have been easier for me.

* * *

Ummmm... Might be kind of weak plot line, but hey, it's obviously fanfiction. I can write what I want!

Detectiveram


End file.
